Hi and welcome to my blog!
I started this blog as a way to reach out to my readers and answer some questions along the way. Several people have written to ask about the characters in my books and the questions often were about the motivations or even diagnoses of the characters. It would appear that the longer I am involved with psychology, the more and more I find that everyone wants to know just a little more about the subject, so I might be able to help you with that.
Lets start with Jahi, the demonic prostitute from book one, Michael’s Passion. The inspiration for Jahi came when I was working as therapist in a women’s correctional institution. Many of the women I worked with were prostitutes and usually drug addicts too. Often they would tell of horrific interpersonal traumas in childhood and early adulthood and yet they were still amazing people. It was awe inspiring to see how high they could rise when people began to believe in them and they, in turn, began to believe in themselves.
You see, we all tend to believe the things that people say about us, or the messages that we receive about other people’s perception of us. Sometimes these are direct message like a parent saying “You are so smart!” or sometimes they are inadvertent messages like a parent coming home from work, ignoring their child, and going straight to bed every single day. The message conveyed there is “You don’t exist” or “I wish you didn’t exist,” or “you are not worth my time.”
I am picking on parents because they have so much influence over a child’s developing brain, but the truth of the matter is that we all get these messages constantly throughout our lives. It may be smile when you walk in the door of your office or it may be someone ignoring a text. As you will note in my books I point out that all behavior is communication, and your brain registers this subconsciously even if you are not aware.
So what does this have to do with Jahi? Jahi was abused and neglected as a child. The message she received was that she was only valuable as a person if she was having sex. Then she met Michael, who gave her other messages which bolstered her self-esteem. When she began to believe them she began to get better.
This is, of course, an over simplification because if years and years of the kind of abuse she received was that easily solved, then therapists wouldn’t have a job, but none the less that is ultimately how it is solved, by someone giving them a corrective emotional experience.